My Fake Book Report

“What a wonderful display of imaginative power, an exceedingly excellent tale of epic proportions, a kind hearted story formed from the basis of the complexity of teenage youth.” These quotes, taken directly from The New York Times Book Review describes one of the most popular books of 2009, How to Survive Weirdoes, by the aspiring Apple Pies, whose literary works have consistently touched the hearts of America’s youth. In his novel, Pies elaborates upon the life of the average teenager, even exploiting their social, economic and mental weaknesses.

How to Survive Weirdoes tells the story of the young Greg McCoy, an eight grader living in the small town of Hefterfield, Colorado. Greg is not what one would call the “perfect child”, as proven by his constant antics in life. He is also the bottom of his classes, which infuriates his parents to no end. Despite all of his negative qualities, Greg has a strong sense of kindness to all those around him…with the exception of Norm RaggleShamggle of course. Norm, the acclaimed “weirdo” of the town, constantly stalks and most of all annoys Greg to no possible end. It isn’t only Greg feeling this way. It is the entire school. This problem finally reaches its breaking point when Norm causes Greg to get suspended for school…for burping! Greg begins to truly hate Norm, so much in fact, that it gives him an idea. “I’ll make a book, a book on, how to survive weirdoes”.

Greg’s novel becomes a large hit with the students. Greg friends and even his parents, who originally did not approve of the book, incessantly comment on his publication skills, sparking various publishing companies to come after the boy. “We’ll give you $100,000 to publish with us. No choose us, we’ll get you a free college education!” The book is eventually published, and becomes a worldwide bestseller. Everywhere he goes now, Greg is perceived as “A God of Weirdo Saviors, A Master of Plans, and Weirdo Slayer Extraordinaire”. However, Greg soon realizes that someone is excluding themselves from celebrating his glory, his unfathomable popularity. That person just happens to be the young Norm RaggleShmaggle, who has quit school and never left the inside of his raggedy house, which has been target of toilet paper and eggs ever since the novel was made. Greg’s heart is conflicted: “What to do? I don’t want to go back to being a loser but I don’t want norm to suffer this bad” Will Greg make the right choice in helping his friend, or will he fade into the darkness of popularity? Buy the book to find out more, now being sold at local bookstores near you.